Some days are just more challenging and worse then others. This was a day I rather would have put a black mark over in the calender.
First.....My older son.. yeah,, i can just tell that he made me so sad and mad that I shouted all the way down to South Africa, both yesterday and this morning. ( worthless but It just came).
There is no license to be a mother and at this time, I guess I would never pass the certification.. or it was just what i did maybe? puh...
I will not tell you any details about it, but imagine the worst, some teenager in my house during the weekend while i was away.. and then some more teenagers.. not invited coming to see what was going on..Yes. catastrophy is the word and I felt I was raped. I dont care about the things, but the feeling to have people sneeking around among my stuff and life in my house... no, that is just to much.
Even for a strong woman like me.
I have to deal with it and I just need to gather myself and be structured, but the police will be involved. Thats probably the only right thing but i have to cool down.
Second... I got a message that somewhat just made me burning.. in a sad way.. maybe it is an opportunity, I just need to face it like that. But it was not a message i wanted or liked, but just have to accept it... or not.
Third,,... I fucked up a scheduled meeting with US this afternoon, damn... i was just to upset and unstructured today.
Ok.. some good things as well..
First... my manager had some great news to me today and time for a small dance in the office... Good work Anna. And that was just so right in time.
Second,,.. I got a phonecall which in one way made me dancing again ... at least the second part of it.. the first part..... se above .-)...
Third,,... The US meeting could take place from home in the evening and with a great outcome.
Fourth... made some good homework with the oldest son and tried not to be to influenced by me strong emotions about his bad happenings during the weekend.
So..overall...
what a bad crazy day.... sometimes it is just too much, and the one up there supporting me one week ago...where are you? Now, he just wants to test me in many ways, plese be some kind to me. I cant take any more at the moment.
Give and get some Energy and strength for the future.
This is the song I eat at the moment.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1iLDIj0pDHk
Love
A
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