So the last final hours in this lovely house/flat. I have had my boys here part of the day and that was great. Today I was reminded about my part time mothership and it was some kind of painful in more then one way.
This morning I picked up Robin for following him to school. First time for me but not for him.
The teachers watched me carefully and was happy to see there is a mother in Robins life as well.
Everything went great and I left a little happy boy in school after he had given me a tour in the school and telling me all the rules, the ways to go and everything else that is important to him. Kiss and good bye mamma.
The mother Anna was not happy I can tell. I cried all the way to the car. Fuck me for all my choices. 'Well tears are not needed at the moment so... just to gather myself.
A day full of packing and it seems that the stuff will never end. I have threwed away a lot but obviously there are lot more to considered needed or just over kill. Most of the stuff are kind of not needed.
Back to school to pick Robin up. As happy as when I left him and it is so lovely to join him in his energy. Also to have his guidance to my wrong parking as well... he is in control my little boy.
We enjoyed the afternoon together. Rented a pick up car and he loved to be in the frontseat with high volume on and just watching me working, loading and yes... he was the king in the car.
He was also the king when his father joined us for some work and support. Thank god... it was help sent from above. Robin Even more happy to have a pizza with his both parents talking in a nice mood and atmosphere as well. Mostly about the x-.s new girlfriend/ woman... i have to admit I am curious about her. And extremely happy for him. He deserves all happiness. Robin is a bit jealouse but that is kind of natural.
So... time for the question... do you want to stay with mother tonight or go "home" with father ?
Well .. I guess you can realize the answer... and I admire my son´s strengthen and choices.
And more tears... fuck me for my choices. Robin is happy and confident and that is the most important. Robin will never notice my tears, that is a golden truth.
Simon and CHarlie are here with me and that is of course happiness in a huge other dimension.... they will sleep over this last night and it is good sharing.
Where the hell do I get my strengthen and happiness from still? That is a damn good question.
Bye bye Hässelby suburb. You have been nice to me and my boys. Something new is waiting for us and it will be exiting. Fergie... this song is good.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5AyHbrCYb0
Love and confident
A
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